Peer pressure from those who are supposed to help.

Possible trigger warnings, don't read unless you feel up to it darling. ♡

So I've only ever had one therapist that I trusted, and years ago she went on maternity leave. Before she left, she told her replacement, "Don't push Angel into anything. Don't force her to come or appointments, or make decisions for her. She's stubborn, and is very opinionated. If you do any of these, it'll do more harm to her than good."
That therapist had to learn that the hard way, she started trying to force me into more appointments but I skipped every one of them. She learned that it was better to do things on my own terms, or there's nothing to discuss.

But my current therapist isn't living up to this.

I've skipped appointments and ignored her for almost a month, because the last time I saw her she brought me to tears because she wouldn't stop trying to force me to do something I didn't want to do.

Tomorrow I'm going to have a meeting with her, and tell her to stop forcing me into thing I don't want to do. I'll try to make it as civil as possible.
But, knowing my foul temper, if she pushes too hard I'll happily tell her where she can stick it. Right up her butt!

(sigh), I'm sorry my darlings that I haven't been posting recently. I've been having a hard time putting my thoughts into words.
And I'm sorry that my first post in a while is so negative.

I promise, I'll post something cute tomorrow. ♡
Have a good night my darling, I love you. Stay strong, for us both. ♡

Why can't people be grateful?

I like to think I'm grateful for what I have.
I've lived in some pretty shit situations in my life. I've been homeless, lived in motels, jumped from different relatives houses for weeks, lived in single room houses and currently live in a house that could be sold from under me at any time.

I'm happy with what I have. I have four walls and a roof and I have food sometimes. Only when Mum has extra money and has already bought her daily alcohol.

There are things I would like to have, like internet and a working car and maybe some money to buy

But my family is never happy. They always want, want, want. They want an Xbox, they want a big house, they want computers, they want iPods, they want toys, they want everything.

I'm happier than the rest of family, and I'm on suicide watch.

Oh the irony.

Humans confuse me.

Why do people go looking for fights?
It's not fair, and they fight over the smallest things. The worst part is, why are people so easily offended?
I get mistaken for a boy all the time because have short hair, and I think it's kinda funny. I hear my Mum argue with people over the phone because she jokingly said she'd marry her best friend.
It's not hurting anyone, it's just a simple mistake or joke, it doesn't need to get so far.
Sure, sticks and stones may break your bones but words can permanently scar you, but jokes are just jokes. Jokes that are specifically designed to hurt people are called insults.

Sometimes, people need to learn the difference.

If you struggle through this, I know those feelings. Ignore them, stop talking to them, or block them, their anger isn't worth it darling. ♥